It is with a broken heart that our editorial acknowledges that Valentine’s Day has been solely sexualised over the decades, as if throughout the whole history of humanity, love has always been reduced to or associated with sexual attraction or passion ONLY.

 

The world evolves and with it, the traditional concept of parenthood, parents mainly being perceived as a mother and a father is being ridiculed. With the gender role crisis comes an identity crisis and the notions of mother and father thus become ambiguous.

 

Beyond romantic love between consenting adults, The Bridge Magazine invites its readers not to lose sight of the importance of parental love or guardian love for their children and for the well-being and success of these children.

 

 

The psych sociologist and writer, Jacques Salomé wrote that

 

“The model of love most innate in humans is parental love. (…) It is the only love offered to children to enable them to build discipline, self-confidence, autonomy, ethics, the respect of others and independence.”

 

 

We are in the midst of a gender role crisis or a decline of traditional love at a time when fundamental values are crumbling.

Those fundamental values are considered basic inherent values in humans such as: peace, loyalty, truth, honesty, love. As they bring out the fundamental virtuousness of human beings and society.

 

 

Wars, ideologies, tradition, socio-political crises, and subjective elements of self-identification are becoming all pervasive.

 

 

With the incremental constant rise of social media consumption; physical, moral, psychological violence, subtle bullying, manipulation, social exclusion and showcasing the depravity of morals are becoming the norm.

 

 

The love of parents and guardians towards their children takes a hit, thus becoming almost a mirage at the very moment when youth around the world need it more than ever for their full development and success.

 

 

According to recent statistics from the World Health Organization (WHO), the global divorce rate is approximately 2.5 per 1,000 people. However, this rate varies from a country to another. The United States of America has a very high divorce rate, with more than 4 divorces per 1,000 people.

 

 

The lack of affection for children and the selfishness of adults is one of the causes of high divorce rates worldwide.

 

Sadly, according to recent statistics, more than 44% of marriages end in divorce according to the National Institute of Demographic Studies (INED.)

 

Divorce rates are an important indicator for the stability of family relationships in any given country.

 

​Faced with this unfortunate ordeal in life by confronting their solitude, children may experience negative emotions, among others: grief, anguish, fear, anger, anxiety, stress, the feeling of abandonment, the feeling that one or both parents consider them as a rival, behavioural problems, depression, academic failure, etc.

 

 

When marriage is on the rocks, if some parents make compromises and wait until their children are between 6 and 12 years old to divorce, it is because according to sociologists, children over 12 years old understand better the complexity of relationships and easily digest the divorce of their parents.

 

On the other hand, other parents, think that making the decision to divorce is very complex and difficult. That is why, to protect children from the trauma that divorce can conjure some parents who are less selfish than others subsequently choose to remain in their non-reciprocal and loveless marriages. This then cements and reflects children’s outlook on future relationships, whilst / mirroring the relationships of their parents or guardians.

 

 

The unconditional spontaneous love a parent holds for their child or children cannot be learnt at school, university or college.

 

 

A parent who loves their children does not show them off rightly or wrongly, neither prostitute them nor place them in direct contact with adults whose ideas or behaviour may not always be predictable.

 

A parent who loves their child or children sees no rivalry between them, because our children in general are a better version of us.

 

A parent who unconditionally loves their child or children spontaneously understands that those of their children who have physical, intellectual, moral or motor skills deficiencies deserve seven times more love, affection, attention, patience to communicate than those who are naturally in good physical or mental health.

 

A parent who loves their child or children knows and understands that children of the same biological parents are all different from each other: each need different degrees of love, affection and attention depending on their natural and acquired abilities. Notably each of them as even identical twins are different, otherwise they wouldn’t be two separate humans at birth.

 

Couples and households that fall apart due to lack of love for their child or children to the detriment of their children’s development are not to be wished.

 

 

Unless there is a case of repeated infidelity involving serious consequences of sexually transmitted diseases or abandonment of the family home.

 

Disappearances and untimely reappearances of one of the parents, which can destabilize the emotional, psychological or academic balance of their child or children, cases of attempted murder, rape, pimping, or poisoning, etc.

 

A parent who loves his children does not take as an excuse/pretext a game of pride, a temporary frustration, an excuse of disagreement or occasional dispute, harmless and futile difference to abandon his or her spouse with the children. It showcases irresponsibility, narcissistic perversity, lack of seriousness, absence of maturity, and above all an absence of love for one’s children.

 

 

What happened to family values? Fundamental values that conditioned humans from childhood to adulthood?

 

 

This season, in the context of Valentine’s Day and in an era where parents are increasingly abandoning the education of their children to social media, to neighbours, our editorial further values one of the important derivatives of
Love. ‘Storge’

 

The term ‘Storge’ is innate in humans, and originates from Ancient Greece:
It is the (Love of parents, children, the nuclear family and by extension the extended family): it is written in our DNA. As soon as a child is born, they are ready to show their love. Storge love/parental love is vital for a child’s growth and development.

 

It is customary that children who feel loved, encouraged, complimented and supervised by their parents or guardians are safe from sexual predators. The love, affection and supervision of parents give them a lot of security and composure: this is how they do not die for attention from strangers, or seek external validation from others in everyday life or on social media.

 

Children loved and supervised by their parents have accounts on social media to be open to the world, open-minded, and as a distraction but not to be in search of popularity.

 

Children who are loved, affectionate and supervised by their parents or guardians are not greedy or are not in search of affection, love, acceptance, popularity, recognition, compliments from others in everyday life or on social media. This protects them from bullies, jealousy, sexual predators, paedophiles who hide behind computer keyboards, mobile phones and malicious sites.

 

 

The Bridge Magazine invites parents around the world to better understand the impact that their sincere and unconditional love for their offspring can have on future marital life, security, health, longevity, social advancement, Bloodline and the success of their children.

 

Our editorial shows parents how children always need the love of both parents if they are lucky enough to have both parents.

It has been scientifically proven that when a child feels loved and protected they becomes attached without discrimination: a child can thus become attached to both parents. This infantile attachment is the first step stone to a long-term relationship which is built on trust.

 

An infant, for example, does not necessarily prefer their mother. Their instinct for survival predisposes them to feel security and reassurance through scent and maternal voice because these are sensations essential to their development.

 

 

In principle, a baby is naturally genetically inclined and programmed to attach to adult figures who takes good care of them.

Hence the notion of extended family in which children seek, rightly or wrongly, for their survival, love, affection, supervision, financial or moral support from a grandparent, an uncle, an aunt, a cousin… more well off than their parents.

Either because their parents are no longer alive, or because they are not materially rich.

 

 

It has been scientifically proven that: the involvement of the father has beneficial impacts on the development of his child or children.

 

 

It has been scientifically and statistically proven that children of involved fathers are less likely to become obese, drug addicts and delinquents, and more likely to succeed professionally…

False debates like a child can succeed without his father remain unrealistic and outdated: the ideal would be to grow up with both parents because the authority, love and presence of a father and a mother under the same roof still retains its letters of nobility.

 

 

Unconditional parental love and its positive impacts on children
Throughout their childhood and beyond.

 

 

Happy parents, mean and result in happy children!

 

 

Traumatized parents, mean and result in traumatized children!

 

 

There is a fundamental factor in the development of a child that we must not neglect:

 

It is not the pompous luxury, the frequency of travel, fine dining meals, expensive toys, board games or any other external sign of wealth, which necessarily contribute to the well-being of children, but instead the well-being of their parent(s).

 

A parent who denigrates and abuses their spouse in front of their children creates a toxic environment for the entire household.

 

As a French proverb says: “A piece of dry bread is better where peace resides, than a house full of seasoned meats where there are always quarrels and violence”.

 

 

Did you know? the absence of parental love for their children makes parents irresponsible.

 

Modern society is so accustomed to the challenging experiences, plight and scandals associated with single mothers to the extent that: when a man takes care of his children, he is automatically adored and praised in society whilst being depicted as a modern day hero despite it being the bare minimum and norm.

 

Caring for your children, whether as a father or a mother, should come naturally out of unconditional parental love. Naturally or spontaneously caring for a child to the best of your ability should be natural, should be the standard. When we justify why we cannot provide the bare minimum for our children, it shows a severe lack of responsibility and the absence of love for little humans who NEVER asked to be born.

 

 

Did you know? The more love and attention a child receives from his parents, the better equipped he or she is to lead a fulfilling life from childhood to full maturity and even beyond.

 

 

A parent who loves their child or children should:
​

 

Be Present (not through the quantity of time spent, but through the quality and consistency of time: even for just half an hour a day.)

 

Emotionally support their children via their unconditional love for them, by proving to them that they will always have someone they can count on no matter what.

 

Communicate with their children, educate them… because, in addition to parental self-sacrifice which involves patience and perseverance, the benefits of parent/child love are numerous. Since they encompass all these precious and unforgettable moments of joy, laughter, tears, sharing.

 

Sharing around a meal, however modest it may be, sharing a board game, a fun activity, this universal and emotional bond that unites family, makes children want in their turn to consider , perhaps starting families of their own in their adult lives. Either to create lives by making babies like their parents, or to ensure their Bloodline, to ensure future generations and preserve the sustainability of the human species.

 

A parent who loves you, shares with you their experience, their wisdom, in order to prevent you from falling into traps, from failing when you overcome life’s obstacles.

By responding favourably to the needs of their babies, infants and children, parents and guardians dissolve tensions and contribute to their well-being. The attention that a child receives through the parents’ gaze, gestures and oral expression develops in them a feeling of security which allows them to grow well.

 

Based on trust and respect, parental love evolves in peaks and troths: manifests itself in joys, sorrows, abundance, failures, successes…

 

 

Parental love strengthens child self-confidence throughout their development and prepares them to face the challenges of life.

 

 

Some parents, out of love for their children, take enormous risks in their work, undergo enormous pressure and humiliation, not to either satisfy their narcissistic pride or to break the myth of social etiquette, but above all to afford to educate their children.

Some parents, shelter their children, to facilitate their social advancement and to enable them to achieve a respectable position in society.

 

 

It may seem trivial, when a parent has a job or when he or she is financially independent but far from it: being able to offer a beautiful cardigan to your child can make a huge difference in their life.

A parent can express his or her love for his or her children when he or she has the financial means to provide them with basic needs (the same basic needs that may appear as luxurious for other parents with less financial means)

 

A cardigan can make a huge difference between two pupils in nursery: the school teacher will spontaneously choose the most diligent, the most polite pupil, who always shows up on time at school, with neat hair and exemplary personal hygiene . A pupil who wears a beautiful and clean cardigan, a well spoken pupil to represent his class range in the main roles , in school play, shows, school competitions, etc.

 

 

If some parents can offer, in addition to the bear minimum, beautiful cardigans, educational toys, a balanced diet, and other accessories to their children…

Others, on the other hand, despite all the love they have for their children, cannot always offer their children a balanced meal, a beautiful cardigan even the second hand version of a beautiful cardigan.

 

When you love your children, you work hard to provide for them and to prevent them from falling below the breadline.

 

 

This is how everything will take shape: although brilliant, capable and willing, these children who do not display a minimum of well-being will be bullied in the playground.

 

They will have few friends, and will therefore isolated themselves, because they are unloved, which will create in them an acute lack of confidence… Which will have a domino effect on their academic results and their personal development.

 

Parental love, this precious heritage that shapes the child’s identity and culture.

 

 

More and more researchers are interested in the educational impact of parents’ love for their children.

 

When a child succeeds in life, he or she is acknowledged and appreciated by (the whole world). But when a child fails, society instantly points the finger at the parents.

 

Once passed down from generation to generation by parents, grandparents, uncles, aunts, elders… the deep parental emotional bond is crumbling.

 

This natural emotional love which allows us to establish basic principles such as honesty, respect for others, love and respect for oneself, love and respect for one’s neighbour, love and respect for personal hygiene and the environment around us, the fear of causing harm, the fear of becoming criminal, the fear of disappointing, the fear of betraying one’s homeland, the fear of dishonouring one’s own family, trust, the love of work, compassion and openness in the child.

 

As a reminder, love is not only sexual attraction or passion, love branches into four different types from a philosophical point of view.

 

Some humans form a couple because they believe they love each other, but get tired from their first argument because they think they have exhausted all the techniques within a couple’s sexual life. Parents at the end of this style of union abandon children who never asked to be born for frivolous reasons.

 

According to the online Larousse dictionary, Valentine’s Day, February 14th, is considered in many countries as the holiday for lovers. Economic Gurus were prompt to focus on the event of Valentine’s Day to maximise profit

 

 

History: a little step back in time…

 

 

Once upon a time in the United Kingdom it was believed that February 14th was the day when birds mated. During this period, lovers used to exchange love poems and call each other “Valentine”.

 

Valentine’s Day is all about flowers and chocolates.

But the holiday has complex historical origins, stemming from several cultures and religions. Valentine’s Day, which has always been a subversive holiday, therefore became in the 1950s a celebration of the normative bourgeois couple.

 

Love and its derivatives

 

The first and most important emotion that develops between people who know each other to a certain extent and which money cannot buy is Love. As a reminder, Love is not only sexual attraction or passion, Love branches into four different types from a philosophical point of view.

 

According to the (philosophical doctrine) of Saint Thomas Aquinas each of the four types of love is suitable for everyone. Humans fall in love for different reasons. Love is unconditional and keeps people connected with each other.

 

Eros (Erotic: marriage, people in a relationship or partners) The term Eros originates in Ancient Greece…it implies passion and an intense desire for something. We often talk about sexual desire, hence the modern concept of “erotic”.

 

 

Storge (Parental love, children, the nuclear family and by extension extended family)

 

Philia (Love of friends and equals)

 

 

Agape is a word originating from Ancient Greece which means affection, tenderness, devotion.

 

Its Latin equivalent is caritas, “charity.” Agape is the type of love that extends to include brotherly love, kinship love or friendship, for all humanity and remains distinct from passionate love.

 

 

It is a type of love, a natural, spontaneous and uncalculated impulse that one has for one’s neighbour without the need for reciprocity.

 

Agape is a type of love that finds echoes in the deontological moral theory of German philosopher Immanuel Kant (1724-1804) and, is arguably one of the best moral theories – Kant was an opponent of Utilitarianism: he believed that certain types of actions (including murder, theft, and lying) were absolutely forbidden, even if they contributed to achieving more happiness than other alternatives.

 

Kant’s ethics affirms the moral importance of giving impartial respect or love to another person, to a human being other than ourselves.

 

Human value is non-negotiable. The intrinsic value of humans is fundamental: Human beings should be what we preserve most.

 

 

For Kantians, The Categorical Imperative is the one we should look at and follow.

 

We must ask ourselves every time we decide to act whether in “Our actions we treat humanity as an end, and never simply as a means.”

 

St. Thomas Aquinas admits love toward those with whom we are related while maintaining that we should be charitable toward all.

 

 

This season The Bridge Magazine associates the notion of parental love with Valentine’s Day and wishes Happy Valentine’s Day to everyone.

​

As a follow up and update of The Bridge Magazine’s 12th Anniversary celebration announcement, Rachel Tcheungna has published 23 educational books in both English and French which are now ready for global distribution.

 

 

Follow the links below to purchase one or various of The Bridge Books. 

 

 

1)    Global News That Never Fades: From Britain’s News to World Exclusives.

 

https://www.lulu.com/en/gb/shop/rachel-tcheungna/global-news-that-never-fades-from-britains-news-to-world-exclusives/paperback/product-ennmdm.html?page=1&pageSize=4

 

 

 2) Beauty, Health and Wellbeing Global News That Never Fades: The Bridge Magazine Book – From Britain’s News to World Exclusives.

 

https://www.lulu.com/en/gb/shop/rachel-tcheungna/beauty-health-and-wellbeing-global-news-that-never-fades-the-bridge-magazine-book-from-britains-news-to-world-exclusives/paperback/product-znpgek.html?page=1&pageSize=4

 

 

3) Education Global News That Never Fades: The Bridge Magazine Book – From Britain’s News to World Exclusives.

 

https://www.lulu.com/en/gb/shop/rachel-tcheungna/education-global-news-that-never-fades-the-bridge-magazine-book-from-britains-news-to-world-exclusives/paperback/product-8mve4p.html?page=1&pageSize=4

 

 

 4)  Love and Relationship Global News That Never Fades: The Bridge Magazine Book – From Britain’s News to World Exclusives.

 

https://www.lulu.com/en/gb/shop/rachel-tcheungna/love-and-relationship-global-news-that-never-fades-the-bridge-magazine-book-from-britains-news-to-world-exclusives/paperback/product-zn269w.html?page=1&pageSize=4

 

 

5)    True Crimes and Prevention Global News That Never Fades: The Bridge Magazine Book – From Britain’s News to World Exclusives.

 

https://www.lulu.com/en/gb/shop/rachel-tcheungna/true-crimes-and-prevention-global-news-that-never-fades-the-bridge-magazine-book-from-britains-news-to-world-exclusives/paperback/product-vnr49d.html?page=1&pageSize=4

 

 

6) Economy and Investment Global News That Never Fades: The Bridge Magazine Book – From Britain’s News to World Exclusives.

 

https://www.lulu.com/en/gb/shop/rachel-tcheungna/economy-and-investment-global-news-that-never-fades-the-bridge-magazine-book-from-britains-news-to-world-exclusives/paperback/product-4evpye.html?page=1&pageSize=4

 

 

7) Soft & Hard News Global News That Never Fades: The Bridge Magazine Book – From Britain’s News to World Exclusives.

 

https://www.lulu.com/en/gb/shop/rachel-tcheungna/soft-hard-news-global-news-that-never-fades-the-bridge-magazine-book-from-britains-news-to-world-exclusives/paperback/product-r2dywj.html?page=1&pageSize=4

 

 

8) Urban Legend Global News That Never Fades: The Bridge Magazine Book – From Britain’s News to World Exclusives.

 

https://www.lulu.com/en/gb/shop/rachel-tcheungna/urban-legend-global-news-that-never-fades-the-bridge-magazine-book-from-britains-news-to-world-exclusives/paperback/product-k4ne79.html?page=1&pageSize=4

 

 

9) High-Profile People Global News That Never Fades: The Bridge Magazine Book – From Britain’s News to World Exclusives.

 

https://www.lulu.com/en/gb/shop/rachel-tcheungna/high-profile-people-global-news-that-never-fades-the-bridge-magazine-book-from-britains-news-to-world-exclusives/paperback/product-9v5vnj.html?page=1&pageSize=4

 

 

10) Arts and Culture Global News That Never Fades: The Bridge Magazine Book – From Britain’s News to World Exclusives.

 

https://www.lulu.com/en/gb/shop/rachel-tcheungna/arts-and-culture-global-news-that-never-fades-the-bridge-magazine-book-from-britains-news-to-world-exclusives/paperback/product-q764zz.html?page=1&pageSize=4

 

 

11) Travel & Tourism Global News That Never Fades: The Bridge Magazine Book – From Britain’s News to World Exclusives.

 

https://www.lulu.com/en/gb/shop/rachel-tcheungna/travel-tourism-global-news-that-never-fades-the-bridge-magazine-book-from-britains-news-to-world-exclusives/paperback/product-w8kj6v.html?page=1&pageSize=4

 

 

12) Politics Global News That Never Fades: The Bridge Magazine Book – From Britain’s News to World Exclusives.

 

https://www.lulu.com/en/gb/shop/rachel-tcheungna/politics-global-news-that-never-fades-the-bridge-magazine-book-from-britains-news-to-world-exclusives/paperback/product-n5954v.html?page=1&pageSize=4

 

 

 

 

 

 

Rachel Tcheungna,
Author, Writer of The Bridge Books and
The Bridge Magazine Editor.